“Officer Eduardo Marmolejo, 36, and Conrad Gary, 31, of the Chicago Police Department were struck and killed by a South Shore train on 12/17/18. This took place while they were chasing after a suspect following a ShotSpotter alert of shots fired.” This was the first headline that I read on Tuesday morning. It reminded me of three years ago when an officer at my husband’s department passed away while on duty. Officer Bryce Hanes was killed when a drunk driver collided with his patrol car. Learning of the tragedy that morning was devastating to my husband. This devastation was no different than the loss of the two Chicago police officers this week.
Initial Shock
As a LEO wife, I try to encourage deep conversations with my husband surrounding events like this. After learning of the loss of a fellow officer, my husband has shared with me that he gets an immediate sinking pit in his stomach. At first, you don’t know who was involved nor the circumstances surrounding the event. Most officers have selfless tendencies. After all, they selected a career to protect and serve their community before all else, including themselves.
Most officers do not dwell on the fact that this could have happened to them. Instead, the focus shifts immediately to ‘what can I do to help?’ As away to cope, many officers may even wonder if there was something that they could have done to help if they were there at the time. For the most part, the officer accepts that a piece of their blue community is now gone. Despite this, they straighten their duty belt and head back out onto patrol. A passerby would never know the loss that the officer is silently coping with in his or her own community.
Sharing the Devastating News
As media and social headlines start to reach a global scale, the impact on the police community deepens. Agencies from all over show their solidarity by wearing mourning bands on their badges and flying their flags at half-staff. The investigation continues and additional details are released about the tragic event. Perhaps an officer who knows someone (or maybe they don’t) at the involved agency will reach out directly. This is done to express condolences and again, ask if help can be provided in some way. An unwritten law exists among police agencies, police officers and LEO supporters: We are all united. We support and help one another unconditionally. We are brothers and sisters. We are a family that lives together behind The Thin Blue Line ESPECIALLY when times get tough.
Community Response
LEO’s and LEO supporters start to think about the families of those who lost their lives. Supporters post condolences, create fundraising pages, share pictures and memories and hold vigils. Those closest to the fallen officer provide direct support following the death of an officer. As the message grows to help the grieving family, others find ways to contribute and get involved. Departments from all over, family, friends and the community all pull together to support the heartbroken family. This ranges from meal prepping, monetary donations, gift cards, providing gifts for the children around the holidays and even offering to help with childcare or cleaning the house. This support defines the humanity that exists behind the badge and it is a truth that this community lives for.
How You Can Help
Two GoFundMe accounts have been set up for each of the fallen officers. You can contribute in any amount that you feel comfortable with by clicking here:
Officer Conrad Gary EOW: 12/17/18
Officer Eddie Marmolejo EOW: 12/17/18
When faced with a tragedy like this, it impacts us all. Please find additional resources for surviving family members at: http://www.survivorresources.org/, https://www.concernsofpolicesurvivors.org/ and https://www.mastersincounseling.org/guide/loss-grief-bereavement/
To my dear LEO Warriors, if any of this resonates with you, I want you to know that you are not alone. I think that you are beautiful, you are strong and you are LEO Warriors. Sign up for our newsletter and receive resourceful information that is completely curated around YOU. If you have a writing suggestion, please comment below. Like us on Facebook @leowarriors1.
